They're Both Funny, Just Sort of Different Funny

If any of you happened to catch this week's episode of The Family Guy (Nov. 13th -- "Brian Goes to College"), I hope you enjoyed it. A very good friend of mine wrote it -- it's his first paid writing gig in this hell-hole of a town. Congrats, Matt!

Matt's wife hosted a party and screening of the episode Vitello's, an Italian restaurant noted both for their delicious food as well as being the place Robert Blake, um, didn't, kill his ex-wife. After drinking a few glasses of wine, someone had the courage to ask the waiter which booth Bonnie ate her last meal in before Robert, um, didn't, kill her. So the waiter showed us. "That's where he left his gun," the waiter said. Then he brought us to a window and pointed out the place in the parking lot where Bonnie was(n't) shot by Robert.

How insane is it that Robert Blake's alibi for not killing his ex-wife is that he forgot his gun in the restaurant?!?! I couldn't have shot her! My gun was in the restaurant! But maybe it's not that insane, because I guess they tested the gun and it hadn't been fired recently. So, maybe he's a genius. He set up the most insane alibi of all-time -- using the (seemingly) smoking gun as proof of not committing the crime, and said smoking gun is shown to literally not be the smoking gun. One time when I was a kid my mom yelled at me for eating an Oreo cookie before dinner. I should have showed her the vanilla cookie crumbs on my sweater to prove I didn't do it. If O.J. was smart, he would have carried a machete around with him -- one that matched Nicole's wounds exactly but with no blood on it at all. "I couldn't have stabbed Nicole. I was getting my knife sharpened at the time she was murdered."

If there ain't no stain, you can't arraign!